i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
