Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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