Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
