Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
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