Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
