i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I love you. Go after that dick
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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