U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
My pussy is not your playground.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
