singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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