I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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