The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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