He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
