You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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