Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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