I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
