Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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