The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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