Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
