So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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