He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
It's like God shit irony all over that family
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize
