Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
