So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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