is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
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