You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
