Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize