He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
