i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize