she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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