i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
