with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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