a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Where did you get a picture of my penis
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
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