Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
