yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
