She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
