Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize