Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
