1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
