when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize