I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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