New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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