how can u be prego again
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Randomize
