one two three fourrrrnication!
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I just found a bag of teeth...
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
