I think I died a long time ago.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
