he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
