wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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