so that wasnt chicken after all
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize