I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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