either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
they need to just BURY HIM!
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
