therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
