She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
