You smell like stripper and shame
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
