Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize
